(I am not going to take the time to link every individual song throughout this. I thought about it, but come on who do I think I am.)
If you want to follow along, the album is linked here: 69 Love Songs
- Absolutely Cuckoo — Person A meets person B, and is already head over heels. A is afraid that B will know think they are cuckoo, so they decide to wait to show that, which will inevitable cause B to leave. My first thought is, why the heck is this song in six? I guess one really great thing about six is that it seems to flow so smoothly and create an unending feel, which pairs really well with the fact that there isn’t a break in the lyrics very often. Being in six also makes it feel like a ‘new’ experience, pulling me closer in a way that a traditional pop song wouldn’t. I don’t seem to hear a traditional chorus either; the entire lyrics are just repeated over. Is this because this is the first thought that this person is having after meeting the person they love? The lyrics say “don’t fall in love with me just yet // we’ve only recently met” which kind of explains why this song, and the pair, lack a repetitive chorus. It also explains who the cuckoo is in this situation, if you believe that love at first sight is cuckoo.
- I Don’t Believe in the Sun — Person A is sad that Person B is gone, and now doesn’t believe in anything happy, including the sun. So, this is half the speed of the previous song, which is definitely a drop. The lyrics are even more of a drop. And, a breakup already? Either Stephen Merritt just randomized the song list before releasing the album, or these are different people. This song is also much longer, almost three times the length of the first song. Paired with the slow tempo, and these super repetitive lyrics, it makes feel much longer. I would guess that these repetitive lyrics are to show how breakups leave a person going over the same conversations over and over again. This song is sad, but I guess it does the job for sad love songs.
- All My Little Words — Person A is saying that Person B is amazing, but B will never like A no matter what B does. This song is so backhanded lol. Like yeah, A wrote this song, but it is not directly for B, rather it is about B. Although A keeps saying how much they love B, but it doesn’t sound like A is giving B effort, but rather saying “even if I did give effort, it wouldn’t be enough”. Sounds like a sweet song, but is pretty condescending. Totally fits an album of songs about love songs.
- A Chicken With Its Head Cut Off — Person A is comparing their love to, a chicken with its head cut off? Bold choice. I really hope this is commentary bad country music, because it both a country song and terrible. Really pushing the southern drawl on this one, Stephen. I will admit, it has a catchy beat, but that’s the point. The lyrics are pretty on par for country, mentioning random words like ‘barnyard’ and ‘eel’, which definitely would never be in any non-country song. Also, I am pretty sure that this person is trying to serenade someone, but they explicitly mention in the lyrics that they have a wife. On par for country, I guess. Also, love the “woah, Nellie” that Merritt throws in.
- Reno Dakota — Person A is upset at Reno Dakota for not loving them back, and for messing with their heart. The tempo is hard to follow because of the fact that the only instrument in this song is a banjo. It forces you to pay more attention to the lyrics which is really great, and gives the song a limerick style feel. Also, this song really shows how much Merritt loves to rhyme. This whole song feels like an “lmao look at my rhyming skills”. Not much else to say except for the fact that when the lyrics say “do not play fast and loose with my heart”, the lyrics break from their repetitive melody in the rest of the song to a very loose pattern, which I think is just brilliant of Merritt.
- I Don’t Want to Get Over You — Person A is going through a breakup and is being rebellious. Nothing to say about this song besides it being incredibly amusing how fitting it is for a rebellious teenager. Reading Camus, smoking a clove cigarette, it’s great. And yes! If you’re reading this, do the rebellious thing you’ve always wanted to. Dye your hair, cut your bangs, text your ex. We only have one life.
- Come Back from San Francisco — Person A is begging Person B to come back to NY from SF. According to A, there are too many distractions for in SF, and B reallyyy needs A. I had already heard this song prior to this album review, and love the music for this song. The guitar is so great at playing a harmony that pairs well with the voice, while also filling the space between verses through an echo of the melody. This is also the first song to give genders and sexualities to the people in the song; in this case they are gay men, slightly hinted at by San Francisco. It is interesting how A is saying that B needs him, when A is the one that is trying to prove to B that he needs to come back, by saying “there are too many distractions” and “I’ve quite smoking”. I also love the lyric that says “I’ve never stayed up as late as this”, which is all too real for people in the east coast with partners on the west coast, and I definitely wouldn’t have caught that if I hadn’t been in that bot before. This seems less like a stab at love songs and seems like a pretty genuine love song. Amazing overall, but I don’t think tree and poetry count as a rhyme, Merritt.
- The Luckiest Guy on the Lower East Side — Person A is really ugly, like really really ugly, but he has a car and is trying to win over the incredibly popular Person B. This song is interesting in how its right after another song in New York. I’d like to believe all of these people are living in the same universe, and Merritt is trying to show just how radically different love is for people so close to each other. Let me just say, I love this song. Ignoring the fun music and dissonant bridge, the lyrics are hilarious, and so accurate to New York, where almost no one knows how to drive (including those with cars).
- Let’s Pretend We’re Bunny Rabbits — Person A wants to ‘be like bunny rabbits’ with Person B. You get the gist. I’d like to believe that when the song mentions donning bunny suits, it is referring to the fact that rabbits don’t wear clothes. I would prefer to not think about to adults in bunny suits having a load of fun. It’s also a little amusing that this is song number nine, it shows that Merritt really is an immature teenager. Apparently Merritt wrote this song because he was thinking about making shirts for his album, and thought that bunnies were a fitting icon for 69 songs about love. Again, teenager. Also, hilarious.
- The Cactus Where Your Heart Once Was — Love is like a cactus, it hurts and won’t let go but it has pretty flowers. This is a really short song, it has one stanza and that’s it. Very much a cliche love song, but I guess you need one after the past two joke songs. I will say, lovely instrumentation. If you haven’t noticed, I am a huge fan of simple acoustic instrumentation, and the lute is providing the tempo and harmony needed to keep the guitar supporting the voice. Solid song, I wish it was longer. But how long can you keep the cactus metaphor going?
- I Think I Need a New Heart — Person A is having a hard time saying how they feel, so they have to write it in song form. I really think that this song is just a stab at all of the artists that write these really deep songs about love, and have terrible relationships. I’m thinking of the ones that write songs about what love means while they cheat on their partner during tours. These people of course can’t say how they feel, because they need to plan out what they are going to say so that it doesn’t upset their partner, and also so they can get a little money out of it, too. Weird instrumentation, albeit catchy.
- The Book of Love — Person A thinks that the Book of Love absolutely sucks, but when Person B reads it or sings from it, it’s okay. Cheesy and simple. I love the phrases in this song. A is saying this like “damn this book is heavy and long” but also “I love when you read to me from it”, since I have a soft spot for cheesy affection. When the lyrics mention the songs in the Book of Love, they say “some of it is just transcendental // some of it is just really dumb” which I think accurately describes the songs in this album. You have some songs that are really beautiful, and some that are just silly. and some that are just shaped like hearts, like those in the Book of Love. This is the first song I heard from the Magnetic Fields, so I have a soft spot for it.
Continuing with songs 13-23 soon!
With my head cut off,
Oswaldo.
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