69 Love Songs Review – Disc Two, Part One

(I am not going to take the time to link every individual song throughout this. I thought about it, but come on who do I think I am.)

If you want to follow along, the album is linked here: 69 Love Songs

24. Roses – Buy stocks in roses. That’s it? Four lines, no instrumentation? It ends as quick as it started. To me, this song gives of a church choir feel, with an open and echo-y sound. This makes the lyrics sound prophetic, and Merritt probably meant them to be so. Roses are the symbol of love, so they’re never going to go out of style. So sure, buy stocks in them because they’re guaranteed to be successful! Unless you hate capitalism, then maybe burn the roses.
25. Love is Like Jazz – Love is like jazz, a complete mess that you make up as you go along! Let me first say, I love jazz. I was in jazz band for a hot sec during my schooling, and jazz has heart to it. That being said, I totally get why Merritt thinks it’s a cacophony of useless noise. And I will give it to him that he does make a good dig at white jazz. He features the simple bongos, a bass that offers walk-downs and chords, and then an improvisational instrument (an accordion) on top of it. And the accordion, although terrible, does actually do much of the tropes that big improvists will do, such as playing the same note in accented triplets, random flourishes, syncopated scales, and does so in a way that is incredibly unappealing. He even adds in the one-off by putting in wind chimes. I’m not even going to talk about the lyrics, because they’re unimportant and this song hurts my ears. Jazz can be good, listen to some dixieland, damn it.
26. When My Boy Walks Down the Street – Person A is thinking about how his boy is so amazing, and can’t wait to make him his wife. The music of this song just screams Summer of ’69, which I really really really hope Merritt did intentionally. Come on, if he didn’t then he can take credit for it and pay me a little. The lyrics are cute and offer a fun dig at gender roles by talking about how “his boy” is going to be “his wife”. Other than that, the lyrics are what you would expect from a song written when people were wearing sports bands and madly in love. Nothing to complain about.
27. Time Enough For Rocking When We’re Old – Person A is talking about how he would rather go dancing, because there will be time for rocking in his chair when he’s old, and time for sex and drugs in heaven. I love that this is a take on one of those classic “when we’re an old couple” songs, and to match the music to the lyrics, Merritt decides that a harp is the true old people instrument. That being said, the harp is a beautiful background for Merritt’s voice. I think the lyrics are interesting because the first half of the song seems pretty normal, you have someone who wants to be out and doing things while they are young and have the energy. But at the end of the song, they say that drugs and sex can wait until they’re in heaven, which are the things that you would expect people in their youth to be doing, honestly. Merritt may be saying that drugs and sex are pretty easy leisure activities akin to rocking or sleeping, which I can agree with to an extent (I mean, you’re not really breaking a sweat when you’re rolling a joint), but still. Strange song, but a good excuse for Merritt to show off his lower range.
28. Very Funny – Everyone knows that Person B is cheating on Person A, except for Person B. How funny is that? This song sounds so Disney. You have these strings and piano in the background giving way for a strong voice, it gives off huge Disney prince vibes. Which is where the sweetness of the song ends, as it is another song with beautiful music that seems heartfelt until you listen to the lyrics. The song cuts off right at the “very funny” line, which feels really strange, but may also be representative of that “haha, i got you” moment right before the big storm off (you know the one). I will say, the song feels unfinished because of it, though. Like there was more that should have been said. Then again, relationships ending a cause de cheating may also feel a little sloppy and unfinished.
29. Grand Canyon – Person A is saying that they could change for Person B, but Person B fell in love with Person A they way they were, so why should they completely change themselves? This is an emotion too many people feel all too often. If you loved me as I was, why do I now have to be different? Offering my two cents, I will say that change is constant, whether you like it or not, so saying “I shouldn’t have to change” is wrong because you have already changed. This song feels like a beg to go back to they way things were, which is an understandable sentiment, but as we all travel through time and experience I would say it is usually an impractical sentiment. “I’m just me // I’m only me // and you used to love me that way” are still powerful lines though.
30. No One Will Ever Love You – Honest love? or love, honestly? I haven’t mentioned it yet, but some of these songs take a few shots at listening for me to make sense of them, or to not make sense of them and pretend I made sense of them. This song is the latter. The music is lovely, the drum set and electronic instrumentation is just light enough to create an airy and mysterious feel. The lyrics are hard to understand because of Merritt’s deliberate use of pauses in strange places. There are pauses in between lines that hint at hidden sentiments. For example, there is a line that goes “you’re not here….to take my sad songs more sincere”, so at first it sounds like their lover is absent, which then turns into their lover being present but mentally absent when the line is completed. The chorus also has no distinct punctuation which begs the question, will no one love them, or will no one love them in an honest manner? Is there even a difference? Does that even matter? Merritt knows. He won’t tell us though.
31. If You Don’t Cry – If you’re not crying, then you don’t actually feel the love you say you do, so why are you hurting yourself? The music is groovy, and gives a path forward to what I feel would be a very slow and lost song without it. The chorus felt like it wasn’t going anywhere at times, and really benefitted from the synth’s moving melody to move into the next section. The lyrics talk about Person B going through what they say is heartbreak, although Person A doesn’t believe that they actually feel heartbroken. And if they don’t feel heartbroken, why are they over-drinking and spending the whole night alone in a club as a method of healing? I don’t know how I feel about these lyrics, as I don’t think that these habits are technically bad, although I can see how they can be harmful if used instead of healing the hurt. Although Merritt claims the hurt isn’t real, so it doesn’t really matter. Person B may need a new friend though.
32. You’re My Only Home – Person A will do whatever Person B wants, unless Person B wants them to go away, because Person B is their “everything”. I will say that this music feels very digital video game, because of that notorious synth. It creates this really uneasy feeling for me when I hear the lyrics of someone trying to do anything to keep their disappearing lover with them, because of how much they depend on them. I’ll use this song as a chance to say that you really shouldn’t center your life around your significant other, especially if you’re not signed into some eternal oath together or something. Trust is important and necessary, but dependence isn’t and creates some really uncomfy power dynamics that are seen in this song, as Person B is most definitely trying to think of the best way to let Person A off easy. I feel for person A, I really do. At the same time, leaving Person B is probably what is best for them. Hopefully they find a new home.
33. Crazy For You (But Not That Crazy) – Person A did everything for Person B, and now they would still do a lot of things for Person B, but not everything. The most important thing to note in this song is Merritt’s dig at himself in the lines “I took a pen in my own hand // and wrote you a hundred tunes”. Only a crazy person would even think about writing a hundred love songs. The lyrics in this song capture this feeling of the journey being better than the destination. The chase of love, the fighting for it, seems to be more compelling than the love itself, and so Person A is still in love with Person B, but a little less so than they were at first. Simple tune, interesting emotion, typical Merritt.
34. My Only Friend – Person A is so sad that they’re drowning their feelings in Billie Holiday songs. The music is definitely a hit or miss depending on who you are, because I know if I was trying to drown my sorrows in music, I would very much go for the passionate piano music with a strong voice. Others, though, may scoff at that idea because they understandably hate piano music. I wonder how many of those people would also be listening to this album. The lyrics are hilariously accurate to a young person going through heartbreak, thinking that the world is over and wanting nothing more than another sad song so that they have a fuel for their tears. Wanting music that captures the scenario they are in, to give a solution but also offer the company of another person who understand how you feel. I will say, though, do you like jazz or not, Merritt? You can’t make a terrible jazz song and then sing glory to Lady Day. Pick a side.
35. Promises of Eternity – Person B promised Person A an eternity, and now they are taking that promise away. Why can’t they just keep the show going? This music sounds so fitting for a Broadway musical, from the flourishing strings to the melismatic voice, which is great because of the “show must go on” theme that the song holds onto. Person A is fighting to hold on to this eternity that they wanted with Person B, which isn’t inherently bad, but the lyrics insinuate that this eternity is nothing but a show. Comparing their eternity to a theatrical show makes it seem like, when the curtains are pulled from their eternity, all the magic will be gone and everything will be ruined. This isn’t inherently malicious until you hear the singer say “What would our friends and family say?” showing that there is a messy part of their relationship that is being hidden, that Person A assures will be revealed if they break their eternity. Sounds kind of like blackmail to me. I am just wondering why Merritt took so long to take a stab at musical theatre, and hoping he does it more because it deserves to be attacked.

Songs 36-46 coming soon!